They won't.
Shut your dirty pie-hole, you failure at reality, you.
This is why you don't have a girlfriend.
I always thought it was because I can quote the entire dialog of the first five quests in World of Warcraft.
...Someone else, please, let me come live in your mind! GET ME OUT OF HERE!
PROTIP: Click the picture to see the whole thing.
I have a picture for you, too, Ben.
Oh? What is it? Is it cool? Is it a picture of waffles? I like waffles.
...You're an asshole.
